What is imposter syndrome and how to overcome it?

What is imposter syndrome?

People with imposter syndrome (also called imposter syndrome ) are afraid of being exposed and accused of being imposters. They are convinced that others will eventually realize that they are not up to the task, have shortcomings or overestimate themselves.

People who suffer from imposter syndrome have one thing in common: they feel they must struggle with this on their own. Unfortunately, they tend to keep this feeling a secret, which actually makes it stronger. By not talking about it, they don't realize that others are struggling with the same feelings. One of the greatest figures who put this feeling into words is Albert Einstein. Even the Nobel laureate thought he was a fraud, despite his intelligence and knowledge.

As many men as women struggle with the feeling of being a fraud. Contrary to what you may think, 70% of the population is prompted to doubt, even if only once or a few times, their status or current situation. And 20% of the population has a recognized imposter syndrome.

Not everyone who doubts themselves occasionally suffers from imposter syndrome. Therefore, it is worth looking at what characterizes this syndrome. Imposter syndrome is based on three fundamental pillars:

The impression that you are wearing a mask

Who among us has never said, "It's pure luck." Or "It is because of my relationship that I am where I am today." This is a fundamental belief in imposter syndrome. The main emotions associated with this impression of deceit are guilt, fear and shame.

Explaining your situation through external factors

Those who suffer from imposter syndrome undermine their own qualities or achievements. They tend to underestimate their strengths and attribute their success to external causes (such as luck, chance, and relationships) rather than internal causes (such as intelligence, skills, abilities, and talents). Also, people with imposter syndrome often reject compliments because they create feelings of fear and shame.

Being afraid of being exposed

People with imposter syndrome are afraid of being exposed and accused of being imposters. They are convinced that others will eventually realize they are not up to the task, that they have shortcomings and overestimate themselves.

What imposter syndrome is not...

Imposter syndrome is not weak self-esteem or low self-confidence. It is not high perfectionism. Or just general anxiety. But these things can be part of it... In fact, you can have a lack of self-esteem or self-confidence without thinking you are deceiving those around you. You can have a high degree of perfectionism without attributing your successes to luck and chance. And you can experience stress and anxiety in your daily life without fear of being exposed.

Why do I suffer from imposter syndrome?

Imposter syndrome is often the result of messages and beliefs we have been given from our childhood, especially in our family and school environments. These beliefs are the guidelines or instructions we give ourselves every day. For some, these are even the absolute rules by which they live.

There are three types of beliefs that can potentially lead to the development of imposter syndrome. The first belief is, "Success is a must." This belief can cause you to easily, and mistakenly, assume that success determines your personal worth. Especially if it costs you no effort. It can also cause you to believe that your failures define who you are precisely when you have put a lot of effort into succeeding.

The second belief can be summarized as, "You are different." This refers to being seen as different as a child. You were not like the others, colored outside the lines and were afraid that others would discover this when they got to know you better. This belief often leads to a great sense of shame. If you grow up with this belief, you may be hypersensitive to criticism, rejection and accusations, for fear of not being enough.

The third belief is, "I am not talented." If you suffer from imposter syndrome, you may have felt undervalued or unsupported as a child because of your qualities, skills or intelligence. This belief may cause you to mistakenly assume that your successes come mainly from outside, and that it would even be arrogant to take credit for them. Instead, you cling to the idea that if successes are not externally validated by others, they are not good enough - and, therefore, you yourself are not good enough.

How can I overcome imposter syndrome?

It is important to realize that, as a human being, you can always have some sense of imposture. Imposter syndrome is not a disease, but more of an obstacle to living your best life. With that in mind, here are some steps you can take to reduce the feelings of imposter syndrome.

First, make sure you understand that your imposter syndrome is a feeling. It is not a fact; it depends on a negative image of yourself. This image is based on the three beliefs. After this, you can go through the following steps to overcome imposter syndrome in the most effective way.

Take off the mask

People with imposter syndrome wear a mask - often because it makes them more quickly accepted by others. Allow yourself to develop your authentic self. To be true to yourself and others. Dare to express your thoughts, feelings and point of view while being respectful of others.

Reduce your perfectionism

There is no better fuel for imposter syndrome than setting unachievable goals. If you suffer from imposter syndrome, start by lowering your demands. That way they will be more realistic and achievable. For example, you can spend an extra three hours using that new tool at work, or you can allow yourself to ask for help. You don't have to know everything.

Be aware of who you are comparing yourself to

Comparing is normal. But it doesn't always work in your favor. If you compare yourself to someone who has 10 years more experience than you, you will always have shortcomings. Therefore, adjust who you compare yourself to.

Don't normalize your own successes

People with imposter syndrome automatically tend to diminish or ignore their own successes. "This is normal, isn't it?" Practice gratitude by assigning a positive feeling to every success, big or small.

Take responsibility for your own successes

Often we owe our success to a combination of external and internal causes, such as our environment and our own abilities. Write down your own achievements and discover what personal abilities, qualities and talents made this possible for you.

Listen to your fear

Maybe you are trying to escape imposter syndrome by trying extra hard. The truth is that the fear is just there - which is why it is important to accept this feeling. To do this, try a relaxation method, such as meditation. This will help you let go of certain negative thoughts and irrational beliefs.

Also read: Meditation for anxiety: how meditation can change your brain

Put failures in perspective

A failure is not proof that you are incompetent. Or that you are a cheater. It is simply a way of learning as human beings. Did you know that as human beings we learn the most from negative situations? This is because it increases the likelihood of future success. Go over your past failures and, for each failure, determine what you learned and how you grew. Adopting a growth mindset also increases self-acceptance.

Accept moments of doubt

There are few people who are immensely competent and intelligent who do not suffer from imposter syndrome. Intelligence and doubt often go hand in hand. And in fact, you will never completely get rid of this syndrome. Accept that doubt may surface during difficult times or in stressful moments. Learn to move past this feeling of uncertainty and remember that feelings are not reality.